My children are half Sudanese and because their dark skinned, I have to CONVINCE people they are really my kids….it’s crazy!

Yes…it was pretty racist….

For me, being confused for an adoptive family opens up a wound that somehow interracial families are not OK on their own, that we don’t belong together.

It has nothing to do with adoption. It stems from the racist idea that not only should blacks and whites not marry, God forbid we should reproduce! I hope that makes sense.

Thanks for your comments. I appreciate that you read my blog and that you can tell me what you think anytime.

I also hope you also read the part that my instinct is to migrate toward interracial families with adopted black children; from my post: “…I’ve joined this club of mixed race families, adopted or not. “

It can always be used as a teaching moment. I exclaim with joy that those gorgeous children are absolutely my biological kids and aren’t they beautiful? You may get that person to think a little more before they make such an assumption again.

I admit I do get offended sometimes when people assume that my children aren’t genetically mine. I am very proud to be their mother, and I am honored that they chose me. When I look at them and see their faces as a blur between the lines of my husband and me, I am reminded of the unique blend of love that we share. When I look at them I remember that though we come from two completely different cultures, we have managed to create two beautiful people who synergize those differences into their own unique interpretation. When someone questions that special creation I do get offended sometimes.

But what felt racist to me was this automatic assumption that because I am white and my children are black they must be adopted. Why didn’t she assume I was the babysitter? If I was a brown skinned woman with white, or even lighter skinned children would she have presumed I was the babysitter? Perhaps I am going out on a limb by saying, yes, she would not have assumed I was their mother first. Why must she assume at all?

Rude yes, racist maybe; I will have to keep thinking about that.

Thanks for making me think and for reading my post

I think what truly offended you was the idea that your child isn’t genetically yours – something she may not have immediately considered since her child IS adopted.

I think in today’s world it’s difficult enough to find good people with acceptable morals and life standards and therefore are raising children we can trust to be good playmates for our children. Looking for playmates who are the same color or adopted or not is kind of silly to me.

I also think the woman was very disrespectful to put you on blast at the door, clearly only concerned about her own agenda.

I am sure that having adopted children (especially outside the family’s race) is a club like the mothers with biracial children club. They want to talk to someone who shares their experiences. Women love to talk and share stories. They want to find other like children so that their kids can not feel like an outsider. I doubt the person had any idea that you would find it disrespectful.